BANER FAKAP

Tuesday, March 27, 2012

So I Finally Bought An Ipad


Confession of a Symbian and Android Avengelist

So yesterday after years of saying "ok aku tunggu the next Ipad", I finally liberated a fistful of RM50 notes and bought an IPad2. Some of you might be wondering why now and why just the iPad2? Let me answer these questions

I bought the iPad2 for the wife because I was getting pissed with her hogging the Galaxy Tab. I use the tab mainly to read news and tweet while in bed. Turns out she love doing the same thing as me while in bed. By the time she's done with her reading the battery on the Galaxy Tab would be om the verge of dying. Buying her an iPad2 is the only way for me to make sure my GalTab will no longer be molested by her. HAHA. The price of a 16GB iPad2 was very tempting lately due to the impending arrival of New iPad on our shored. I might as well get one now while they are still in stock and sold at a very reasonable price.

So why just the iPad2 not the New iPad? Simple answer is "coz the iPad2 is cheaper than a Galaxy Tab 7.7". I can get more screen real estate and at the same time getting myself an IOS device. As the senior writer at AMANZ.MY I think it is imperative that i familiarise myself with devices with different OSes. Also most of the locally made apps are made for IOS. Secondly I have been reading a lot of New iPad reviews and I was not that impressed with the new features. The thing that really killed my interest was the insanely ridiculous charging time of the New iPad. Due to the bigger capacity battery (70% bigger), the normal recharging time for the world's best selling tablet is around 9 hours.This is jus simply unacceptable. I also don't think i need the beyond HD display yet. Last but not least too many reports of warm iPad. We live in Malaysia and the last thing we need is a warm device.

So how am I liking the iPad? I like some of the stuffs about it and hated others. I like the fact that the device runs butter smooth. I like the fact that the app market is filled with wonderful apps. I really like how it handles huge PDF files. Oh o........ what i like the most is FLIPBOARD. That is the ONE APP that makes the iPad worth buying.

What I don't like? Too damn big and too damn heavy. Not the best device for tweeting or one handed reading in bed. As I said earlier I use the Galaxy Tab in bed. The iPad is just way too unwieldy. Cannot starch my balls while reading Footbal365, Sokernet and Daily Mail! NO fun wei! HAHAHA. Camera is also a big piece of monkey piss. My almost 2 year old Gal Tab can take better picture and comes with a flash.

At the end of the day the WIFE will be using the iPad coz it's for her own use anyway. She can now play Tiny Tower and Flipboard for the rest of the day without draining the battery of my Gal Tab.

Well now if you can excuse me, I need to read some news on the Galaxy Tab in the toilet while taking a shit! It is in situations like this will you finally realise why 7" inch tablets were created in the first place.

p/s :Humanity is acquiring all the right technology for all the wrong reasons -- R. Buckminster Fuller

Monday, March 26, 2012

The Difference Between Singapore and Malaysia : A Story


Lee Hsien Long.... restecpah

A few months back the wife and me went to Singapore for the third leg of our honeymoon. Yes.. when you are a blogger perasan bagus like me you have to embark on many leg honeymoon. Reason being because of 20 plus years of masturbation, my kneecaps no longer strong enough to do a 2 week long honeymoon in one go. Just so you know the first leg was Penang followed by Langkawi and then Singapore

So anyway while we were in Singapore something awesome happened. We were walking toward the Singapore Flyer on the second day when suddenly we saw 4 police outriders and 2 silver Mercedes Benz stopping at an intersection. At that exact moment we were crossing the road. Now. Usually in Malaysia when VIPs come barreling down the road like a bat out of hell you better not be blocking their way. Also in Malaysia our VIP have this fascination with convoying in number like an A-List RAP star. Seeing a convoy with less than 3 cars in Malaysia is like seeing an article on the Virtues of Buddhism written by Hassan Ali. It is that damn rare or nigh impossible

So anyway we reached the other side of the street and I looked to my right to see who is this VIP that waited for the padestrian to cross the road before continuing his journey. Guess what? It was Prime Minister Lee Hsien Long. Yes! Fucking Lee Hsien Long with his entire entourage who was probably on their way to Marina Bay Sands. I was absolutely shocked. The wife suddenly blurted out.

"Is that who I think it is?"
"Yes Sayang that is who you think it is"

So why is this such a big deal for both of us? As I said our honeymoon required us to drive up and down the Malaysia highway. During the trip we encountered a few other VIP convoys. All these Malaysian convoys bawak kereta like haram. Driving at excessive speed and police outrider shouting at people to basically GET THE FUCK OUTTA THE WAY for these VIPs. One such incident was in Johor. There was a fork in the road. One leads to Senai while another to Johor Bahru town. I needed to go to the left. We were about 200 meters to this intersection and suddenly we heard "ketepi! ketepi!" from the read of our vehicle. Four police outrider and 3 other "luxury SUVs" were speeing in excess of 160 KMH on the middle of the 3 laned highway. Now remember I needed to go STRAIGHT in order to go to JB. If I move to the left as ordered by the police, i would end up entering Senai. But this is Malaysia. You dont have a choice. When the police shouted KETEPI you have to ketepi. At the very last minute I have to swerve to the left and let them pass. The fucked up part was they are also GOING To the left. So why they fuck did they screamed at me to ketepi when I was driving on the right lane going straight instead of left. That left me fuming. Now I have to dodge a few cars that are also exiting toward Senai while I have to somehow cross back to the right just because one asshole VIP wants to get to his destination quickly while at the same time ignoring the speed limit like jalan itu jalan bapak dia.

So there.

A short story that pretty much tell you the a lot about the mentality of the VIPs in Malaysia vs the VIPs in Singapore.

Is it any wonder why Singapore is a much better and LAWFUL place than us? If the Prime Minister can wait his turn and obey the road rules without any exception, no wonder the Singaporean Rakyat also can follow the rules like a well trained circus lion.

Oh well. For more stories on my Singapore adventure tune in next time. When will that be? I dunno LUL!

p/s : If once you forfeit the confidence of your fellow-citizens, you can never regain their respect and esteem -- Abraham Lincoln

p/p/s : Post ditujukan buat PAPASKIZO



Monday, January 09, 2012

Senyum Khinzir #3 - Akronim Baru Untuk DSAI


Anwar Ibrahim tidak Bersalah

Masa untuk menukar makna akronim DSAI itu sendiri



Thursday, October 20, 2011

Book Review - Imperial Life in The Emerald City


Hasil Big Bad Wolf


Minggu lalu berlakunya festival buku jualan pukal di Serdang anjuran Serigala Besar Jahat. Book sale mega ini mengakibatkan aku yang tak suka drive ke Serdang pun dengan relahati kesana. Tahun-tahun sebelum ini aku tak tergerak pun nak pergi. Kombinasi tiada uwang dan malas nak berpusu-pusu dengan ribuan manusia didalam dewan mencari buku. Tahun ini ada uwang sedikit dan si tunang tersayang mengajar dengan suara manja ala iklan Manjakini si Nora Danish.

Kamu pernah kena pujuk dengan si kekasih hati? Kalau belum pernah kamu tak tahu betapa powernya kuasa memujuk ini. Terutama kalau yang memujuk comel macam arnah prairie dengan mata berkilau bagai karakter anime hentai. HAH!

Aku pun kesana dengan berbekalkan RM100. Tak banyak aku tahu tapi itu sahaja yang aku mampu. Lebih dari itu alamatnya aku kena buat book soup akhir bulan dan minum bagi mengalas perut. Tak banyak buku yang tinggal by the time aku kesana. Dah hari-hari terakhir the good books sudah disapu bersih penggila buku yang lain. Yang tinggal hanya stacks of Nigella Lawson, Nora Roberts and Jamie Oliver crap that no one seems to care. I even saw a copy of Miley Cyrus autobiography. How lame is this that a 17 year old punya biografipun ada terjual.

Naturally gravitated towards the history and war section. Was looking forward to get the latest Clancy novel on paperback but it was not on sale. Instead I got me a few books on the war in Iraq, Afghanistan, Iran, WW2 and Arlington Cemetery. Not bad actually with the total damage of RM68.

The book i want to talk about today is Imperial Life in the Emerald City

This book was used as the basis for the film The Green Zone starring Good Will Hunting. #HAH!



Author? Rajiv Chendrasekaran
Classification? Non Fiction
So is the book any good? YES
Is it boring? NO
How much did I paid for it? RM8
What is it about? Post war Iraq and what went wrong
Is the book thick? Nope.. not even 1/3 of Great War for Civilsiation
Paperback? YES

REVIEW

What went wrong in the Iraq immediately after the war. See how REPUBLICAN cronies hired by Bush administration fucked up Iraq in the post war years. See how they tried to bring a free market to a formerly socialist state. In one chapter the writer talked about how during the Saddam regime electricity, water, health and education were free. In the 70's during the oil boom Saddam would import luxury products from Europe and sell it back in government owned shops at a fraction of the price. In the 70's Iraq was the DUBAI of today with massive construction and modernization funded by the endless oil money. The price of a gallon of oil was only a nickel. If you own a factory you also dont have to pay for electricity and water. The raw materials that you need for your factory was also heavily subsidized by the Saddam government.

But what is the catch for all this free shit?

First of all you have no say on how the government works. Saddam had absolute power. Anyone who was brave enough to step out of line will be be jailed. As for the factory owners, you are obligated to hire all the workers that the government sent to you under the command of the Ministry of Industry. It is not uncommon for factories that needed only 1 000 workers to hire 4 000 because the government promised every single Iraqi work. So what happened in these factories? Some go to work just to make coffee. Other sit in a room and do nothing for hours and would collect they paycheck regardless of the amount of work the did that month.

Then the war with Iran happened. This war bankrupted Iraq. The good times ended and to make it worse then Saddam later invaded Kuwait for the lulz (if you read the OLD FOA you would know WHY he invaded Kuwait - Go by Robert Fisk book if u wanna know LOL) . Twenty plus years of UN sanctions later, Iraqis were reduced to drinking vile untreated water from the Euphrates. They cant buy new filtration system or chlorine. Hospitals were forced to use recycled bandages and syringes. Iraqis were pissed at both Saddam and America. They yearn for the good old days. So when America invaded Iraq in 2003 they Iraqis foolishly believe that with Saddam gone, Iraq will magically return to the good old days. Here is where things got interesting.

The Bush administration hired people who are not familiar with middle east let alone Arab culture. They drafted a provisional secular constitution that no Muslim in Iraq would agree. They also brought in more Shi'ites than Sunnis into the government contrary to what had been done for decades under Saddam. This might be a politically correct move to do as Iraq is a majority Shi'ite nation but the Sunnis naturally saw this as a threat to their existence. The American also decided to introduce free market to a socialist state. No more jobs for every Iraqi unless they qualify. They also planned to reduce the amount of civil servants and introduce privatization for the first time in Iraq history. Iraqis would now have to pay MARKET price for oil and basic amenities. It was said that when East Germany embraced democracy in 1990, the west German hired 8000 people to restructure the countries assets and economy. This is typical German efficiency. They also hired the right people with the right credentials to do execute the plan.

America shoved the responsibility of restructuring Iraq's economy to 3 people. No that is not a typo and these 3 poor sods were given 6 months to make everything work. They were also hired because of their loyalty towards the Republican party. If you are a democrat and disagree with the Bush administration policy don't even think of getting a posting in Iraq. Cronyism and nepotism at it's best with the future of the Iraqi people hanging on the hands of these 3 people.

I am halfway through the book and I must admit this is definitely a very informative book. If you want to know what went wrong in Iraq just grab this book today for it is quite an eye opener. You will see some parallels on what Saddam did in Iraq with what our government is doing with Malaysia.Prepare ti be flabbergasted at the sheer incompetence of the Bush administration handling of post war Iraq too. I still can't believe that they did some of things they did like total disregard of cultural sensitivities and Geneva Convention, Bottom line is, Imperial Life in The Emerald City is a book for WARFAGS like me and those interested in history. Grab it now from all good book stores.