UTP is Super Well Rounded Now

Dr Rusti will be facepalming now!

This is a very sad tale. Just days after my sister gave birth to her beautiful baby I read about this piece of news

Pelajar IPT ditahan kes buang bayi

IPOH: Polis menahan seorang pelajar wanita berumur 18 tahun bagi membantu siasatan berhubung penemuan mayat seorang bayi baru lahir di di dalam bilik asrama sebuah universiti di Tronoh dekat sini semalam.

Ketua Jabatan Siasatan Jenayah Perak SAC II Ismail Yatim berkata mayat bayi itu ditemui oleh seorang pekerja wanita yang membersihkan bilik asrama berkenaan pada jam 7 pagi.

Beliau berkata polis dimaklumkan mengenainya lalu mengambil mayat bayi yang masih bertali pusat itu, dan menghantarnya ke Hospital Changkat Melintang untuk bedah siasat.

Menurutnya, pelajar yang tinggal asrama berkenaan ditahan pada jam 12 tengah hari semalam.

“Kes disiasat mengikut Seksyen 318 Kanun Keseksaan kerana menyembunyikan kelahiran dengan membuang mayat secara sulit,” katanya ketika dihubungi di sini hari ini. – Bernama

Can you guess which uni this is? No price for guessing correctly for all you UTPians. Yes my fellow oil heads, our uni just achieved another milestone. We have baby killers in our beloved college. I can’t believe that kids these days are so dumb. No price either for guessing the race of the perpetrator (Hafizi.. stop sniggering old chap! will wait for your YM cynicism!)

The girl is just 18 and I bet she will spend the next 20 odd years in prison for this crime. I hope that the sex session was a mind blowing one with 189 squirting orgasms. Otherwise it sure sucks to go to jail for a shitty fucking session in a 24 ringgit a night hotel! They are getting younger nowadays eh?. In my days in UTP I heard rumours of a few abortion done by some students. People start saying how evil abortion is but you know what? At least they have the decency to terminate the pregnancy early. Abortion is 1000 times better than dumping a baby in a bin any day. At least in abortions the baby is not technically alive.

The main question is how the hell did she give birth to the baby? She must had some help. No way no one heard her wailing.Secondly why can’t she be a wee bit cleverer in disposing the evidence? For god sake UTP have loads of people sharing CSI, Bones and Without a Trace. I know that a typical UTP student is a masters in finding enough time to squeeze 18 one hour TV series, 3 movies , 5 Animes and 34 rounds of DoTa/CS per week. Don’t tell me she couldn’t download an episode on CSI and study it before dumping the body!

If I am a killer , (well I have fantasies about killing... that counts right?) I would dispose the body somewhere further. The Area around UTP is perfect for a body dump. I actually earmarked the huge Chinese cemetery in front of Rumah Kedai as a possible body dump site. The best way is to dump it at night when the smell of pig shit fills the air (there is also a pig farm not far away from the cemetery). There are no traffic movement along that small dirt route after 10pm. Wrap the baby in a blanket and then dump it as far as possible from the road. The whole area is a huge abandoned tin mine and covered with tall grass. When dumping the body remove the blanket. That way it is harder to pin the crime on you. Plus the body will be exposed to the elements resulting in faster decomposition. The smell won’t be bothering anyone due to the amount of road kill on the main road. When I was staying in Rumah Kedai, we got s used to the smell of pig shit and dead biawak/dogs. No one will suspect that a body was dumped there. Come back three weeks later and pick up the bones. Scatter it a you drive around Seri Iskandar, Papan, Falim, Pangkor and Bota Kiri. if you are lazy just dump the bones in the lakes inside UTP. One piece per day. Non one will notice it. Perfect crime achieved.

P/s: Thanks to Mrs Weiland for spreading this gossip 2 days ago. Ingatkan rumour…rupanya real! Dang